Nip Talk: Removing Locks From Body Talk
‘Don’t have sex, because you will get pregnant and then die’,- said Coach Carr in the legendary Mean Girls movie.
Ironically, these words pretty much sum up the amount of information majority of young teens get in their early years of maturity.
Skinny is a synonym for normal, masculinity is a key to men’s success and bigger chest equals a better life. Sounds familiar?
These and all the other myths about body and appearance often play a damaging role in shaping the young mind. Leading to low self-esteem, physical complexes and inferiority it ignites the chain reaction on how we interact with others. Constraints our mind, narrows our imagination and willingness to set goals we eager to achieve.
We grew up in a dark on most things about our bodies. Learning from television or older and most of the time definitely NOT wiser friend's stories filled with legends and misunderstandings.
And if we want to make a change & start a discussion about body positivity, WE NEED TO DO IT RIGHT MEOW!
Let’s begin with us
Starting from our standpoint - we are 3 twenty-smth year old gals, now more known as a Pretty Ugly trio. We grew up in a tiny rainy Lithuania where body and sex education is mostly non-existent. Yes, our biology books do have a chapter about the body and what changes it goes through.
Although teachers usually give only basic information about the presence of genitals and acne. Leaving students to find out how their woo woos and pee pees work from shady sources or sometimes pure imagination.
Some fun myths we believed:
- I had no idea pubic hair exist and that it’s ok to have it. I randomly found an encyclopaedia which explained me some stuff, it contained everything from household chores on how to build a shelf to a short scientific description of how human body functions.
- About the existence of a period, I found out in the 6th grade, at the age 13. Unfortunately, the way an advertising campaign of hygienic products busted it at school in a non-graceful way.
They invited girls to a SECRET! meeting (girls only) and told what a period is. Leaving boys without a clear understanding what happens to their classmates, mums or sisters (even though they wanted to participate). And for girls suggesting an idea that a period is an embarrassing thing that happens to a woman and a man should never be aware of.
- I was 100% sure if I have small boobs the boys wouldn’t love me. This one busted gradually while getting older and realising it’s not the body who makes you choose a partner. Although it came with time I wish at least one older woman told me this earlier, would have solved lots of my insecurities.
- I had no idea what are the pads and why in ads the woman is pouring a blue liquid on it. And parents avoided answering my questions.
- Most of my adolescence I spent waiting to become tall and skinny, because I thought it’s how all grown up girls look like (didn’t happen - I am still 1,66).
- My nose and my crooked teeth were my biggest nightmares which led to making peace with the fact that I will never have a boyfriend and probably die alone.
- Women bodies have to have 0 hair. Shaving is MOST IMPORTANT. From an age where I didn’t have any hair on my legs or armpits, I always knew that the time will come when those should be removed so I waited, patiently. Also, I had a clear vision that the day when I will pluck my eyebrow hairs for the first time will be the day when I start to become a true woman. Because every woman MUST pluck their brows.
- Skinny skinny skinny. My curvy thighs were a horror, I knew that my No. 1 mission to a better future is to narrow them as much as humanly (or not) possible.
- Everything you should know/do according to women's magazines incorporate a lot of absurd and aimless projects in a daily routine and in young girls' heads. I wish that Cosmopolitan & other 'girl' magazines would be taken FAAAAAR away from every teenage ( & grownup) lady.
Getting older and running a blog about the absurd of stereotypes and beauty standards helps to learn about what was lacking back then. It’s not about just us anymore. It’s about all the girls and boys out there who are young and confused & those, who are old enough and still has a set of misinformation.
FROM THIS POINT WE WANT TO ASK QUESTIONS & OPENLY DISCUSS. THERE ARE NO TABOOS ANYMORE.
And a little secret for the ending - We are working on making these talks live. Every month we will invite you to talk about everything out loud - in the cosy meetups. Let’s make it clear and body positive again!